Bullying vs Self-Esteem – The Inconsistencies

I originally wrote this post when a teen had been bullied to the point of seeking out plastic surgery erupted in the media. I went into full rant mode, which usually produces an epic-length post, and this one was no exception. It posted in full on Rebecca Hamilton’s blog as a part of the Books Against Bullies campaign, but as I continue to see issues with bullying people over their appearance, I thought it would be a good idea to resurrect the post and break it into more bite-sized chunks. A few days ago, I posted about how the bullying wasn’t addressed (if you haven’t read and would like to catch up, please click here), and now it’s time to address the inconsistencies I found in this case.

  • The Inconsistencies

    Call me a skeptic, but often when I read something I question the words I’m reading. *snort* Who am I trying to kid? I always question what I read in the news because I know we only receive a part of the story. In the below video posted by the Huffington Post, some inconsistencies grabbed my attention.

    • Before

      Before

    • The Unaware Mother—In the video, Nadia’s mother becomes teary-eyed as she tells the reporter she had no idea how bad the teasing was, and how tormented Nadia felt. Nadia says she hid her pain from her mother because she didn’t want to upset her and burden her more than she already was. It was a nice touching sound byte, but my mind screamed, “Really????” How is it that her mother was unaware how much her daughter felt tormented by the teasing when it has been commonly reported that Nadia begged her mother for the otoplasty surgery at the age of ten? A ten-year-old child doesn’t beg for surgery without provocation. Even in the video, after the statement that she was unaware of how much taunting her daughter endured on a daily basis, it is mentioned that Nadia nudged her mom about having the surgery for a year before her mom agreed. That is hard to reconcile with the touching “I didn’t know.” statement.

    • After

      After

    • The Concerned Physician—I cannot be the only cynic in the crowd who wonders about the physician recommending additional plastic surgery, while heading the organization to provide plastic surgery for those in need, who in essence will pay himself to perform the surgery. And since this has gained so much attention from the media, is anyone surprised by Nadia’s before and after pics being above the Donate button on the Little Baby Face Foundation site? Oh and if you do take a look, please note the the way the pictures have been taken … the before picture is taken with the head angled so you see the right ear, which prior to surgery was the one which stuck out more and dropped a bit at the top, plus, the hair is tucked behind the ear, which causes any ear to stick out a bit more. And the after picture is taken from such an angle that we only see the left ear. In fact, most of the after pictures display the angle showing the left ear. #justsayin

      Back on track with the inconsistencies. During the video, Dr. Thomas Romo, III, states:
      “When you add in the jaw, the nose, the ear, and a patient brings in those complaints. And then you have overlay of the bullying, it makes it within the criteria of someone who could have surgery to correct that.” And then a few moments later: She wasn’t picked to have her surgery because she was bullied. She was picked for her surgery because of the deformities.” Two things with those statements. First, Dr. Romo didn’t say the procedures were necessary, he said could be done to correct them. And second, Nadia went to him to have her ears corrected. Period. Dr. Romo suggested the additional work.

    In the next Bullying vs Self-Esteem post, I’ll discuss how the plastic surgery response was greeted by the American public, so check back soon.

    Originally posted in full on Rebecca Hamilton’s blog as a part of the Books Against Bullies campaign

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